Thursday, June 6, 2013

Rock Bottom (Day Thirty Two)

     July 12th, 2012 - Chennai, India
     The first sound I heard this morning was that of all the B-trippers in the hallway. After showering, I poked my head out and said hello before shutting the door, getting ready quickly and then going out to talk to them. It is kind of overwhelming to see so many new faces, people I do not know. I feel like I am back in Texas, except I have already made a ton of friends, but now there are more to make. At breakfast, I talked and ate with Ctrippers. My heart does not feel ready to give itself to these new people.
     After we ate, we took some time to just mingle and talk. But I was feeling so bad from my cold that I sat down and put my head in my hands and started crying. MY TL came to me to take care of me. Amaya was stomach sick and I was comforting her until I lost it and felt so miserable.
     I explained to my TL, Joy, that everything hurt. I am congested, I have a runny nose, my throat hurts and my head hurts, my ears are clogged. I was crying and I was also overwhelmed by the changes happening. I was put on Joy and Jacobs team instead of Marissa and Andy's and I wanted to continue to be a 'First Responder'. Instead, I am and 'Overcomer'. (Which is kind of ironic.)
     I took medicine and cough drops. Andy took my temperature and then we got together for team time and played the name game.
     When we were done, I went to my room and found out that my new MAG has no Ctrippers. But neither did my MAG in Nepal. Jesus has plans for me in this MAG. I slept in my room, too sick to do anything but cry and lay down. I don't even have a voice. 
     My new MAG, and Beka, Mira, and Crystal all prayed for me and for healing. Jessica gave me EmergenC and then let me rest. Marissa came and checked on me even though she is no longer my TL. She is still my Mamarissa! All too soon we had to go to lunch. I did not eat much at lunch. Jessica told us that she wants our MAG to be servants and I tried to put others before me, but it is so hard to do when you are sick. After lunch we had a time for quiet time, but I slept hoping to feel better. Praise the Lord, I woke up feeling slightly better. We went to a meeting where Ctrippers talked about Nepal and gave advice. Afterwards we had team time, and I watched so many Btrippers falling asleep because of jet lag. 
     Next on our agenda was time for rest.All the Btrippers slept and I talked with Rachel, Brandi and Michelle. We remembered Nepal and tried to say goodbye to all that had happened there. Jesus has me in this new place with new people for a reason.
     We eventually wandered out into the hall and sat with Marissa and other girls until dinner. after dinner, Btrippers called home and I got to go to bed. Joy said I could take more cough syrup and then I went to my room. Before bed, we all prayed and then I taught them what Megan did with our last MAG once the lights were out. 'Come and lie with us Prince of Peace. Kisses to Jesus!' 
     I don't know how to summarize this day. All I know is that it has been so hard because physically and emotionally I have hit rock bottom. I have nothing left. I am so ready to be healthy, rejuvenated and back in the ministry. I am looking forward to seeing what God will do here in India.

     Basically, that was the hardest day of the whole trip. I did NOT want new TL's. I did NOT want a new MAG. I did NOT want to be sick. I felt awful, and I was overwhelmed by finding out I was on a different team. Only one girl from this team switched to my old team. And only one girl and me from our old team switched to this new team. It was hard. So hard. God did a lot with me on that team, but on that day I was pretty much miserable.
     I remember my new MA, Jessica, was determined that I would get better. She prayed over me, gave me EmergenC and just took care of me. It was fantastic.

This is a picture from a week later, after getting to know my MAG real well. This is my MA Jessica!


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